Stitched Lullabies- 4 (Kurloz X Reader)

1AM.

It was 1AM in the morning, and you were stuck in Bucks with Kurloz. He sat across from you, wildly spazzing his hands as he signed to you. ‘When Gamzee and I finally got in the boat, we were all motherfucking soaked head to toe. I remember looking at my brother and telling him how dead he was when we got back to shore…’ You giggled.

A warm smile was on Kurloz’s face as he talked to you about one of his favorite family memories. ‘We finally made it back; I did nothing but laugh with him. I couldn’t blame him for being so excited over catching his first fish. There was my dad and mom, laughing. We were so young and happy…’ He trailed off, pain clear in his eyes.

You leaned forward to place a hand gently on his, smiling reassuringly. “It’s alright…” You whispered. Kurloz smiled weakly before withdrawing his hand to continue to ‘talk’. ‘That was before my mother and father got into the worst fight of their lives. My mom decided to relieve tension by leaving for a few days… but she never returned.’

‘She got hit by a car around ten years ago, and that was when my father’s drug problem got worse. I couldn’t stand living at home anymore, so I recently got an apartment.’ Kurloz explained. You just silently nodded, giving him all the attention in the world.

The male shifted uncomfortably. ‘Gamzee still lives at home. I’m not sure if dad visits or not; we don’t really all up and motherfucking talk about home situations.’ You could tell he was getting stressed. Kurloz looked down at his lap as you reached forward.

You locked your arms around his neck and held him close, nuzzling his exposed flesh. It took a few seconds for Kurloz to wrap his arms around your waist, pulling you right on top of his lap. He nuzzled your head affectionately.

A small sigh escaped his lips as he rested his chin against your (h/c) hair. You figured, that if he could, Kurloz would definitely be purring right now. He pulled back from your hug to gently move a strand of hair out of your face.

His brown-indigo hues burned deep into yours, but he was looking at you differently. Like you were a ghost… Kurloz gently pushed you off, guilt sparking off his face like fireworks. ‘Sorry, (Y/n). I’ll be right back.’ And with that, the tall male strode off into the break room.

You sat there beyond confused, watching him storm into the other room. You shrugged it off easily, sitting upright. Man, what was this strange feeling creeping in your chest?

Kurloz pov

Kurloz held (y/n) close, a new feeling pumping through his veins. He missed holding somebody so close, opening up to somebody- Though he’d never admit it.

Slowly Kurloz pulled back from her, taking in all of her features. Shit, she was pretty attractive… He furrowed his eyebrows, looking past her. No, no. He couldn’t gain feelings for another girl. Not after what happened with Meulin.

A pang of regret surged into his heart like a punch to the face as he looked at (y/n)’s innocent face. Motherfuck. He softly nudged her aside, getting up to walk into the break room. Kurloz sat down on one of the benches, fiddling through his pants pocket.

Kurloz fixed himself a nice blunt with what weed he had in his pocket, glancing at the door to make sure (y/n) wasn’t peeking in. He knew she must have a hunch he does weed.  I mean, the juggalo practically smelt like it 24/7. ‘It’s better off if she doesn’t know anything else…’

He took a deep drag of the substance, letting it rest in his lungs before exhaling deeply. Kurloz hunched over, elbows on his knees as he closed his eyes. This was his life. Drugs, sex, fights, the occasional gang; anything to distract him from life.

Lately, however, he’s been trying to stay away from gangs, fights, and sex. Wouldn’t want to attract a sexual disease at 17, am I right? Plus, hookers definitely wasn’t Kurloz’s thing, and gangs would always end in disaster. Drugs were a different story.

Maybe he just wasn’t made for life if all he did was fuck up?

Kurloz continued to inhale and exhale the weed every few seconds. He growled lowly, rubbing his face as he shook his wild mane. The male flicked ashes onto the floor, watching them ignite slowly, and then fade to nothing.

Shaking his head once more, he furrowed his brow. Kurloz got up, walking to the far end of the room to put out his blunt. He stared at the remains for awhile, as if in a trance. Kurloz went to turn around, but a pair of arms stopped him.

(Y/n) wrapped her arms around his waist, burying her face in his back. Kurloz glanced back at her, but didn’t dare move. Silence filled the room as he heard her take a shaky inhale.

“We’re friends, right ‘Loz?”

Kurloz flinched at her words, nodding in response. He felt (y/n) smile weakly against his build, “good… You know, I’m always here for you… I know shit must be hard- hard enough for you to turn to weed for an escape.” He winced once more. She totally thought weed was all he did?

“But, Kurloz, you’re such a good friend to me and you can tell me anything. I don’t want you to hide yourself from me, or feel like you can’t open up.” She whispered. “I know you are… And I’m not going to lie, it kind of hurts. I care so much, ‘Loz…” Her voice was starting to crack.

Silence filled the room once more as her grip tightened. Kurloz narrowed his eyes as he twisted in her grip, putting his hands on her shoulder as he stared into her eyes. Clearing his throat, he finally found the voice to speak.

“(Y/n). I don’t want you to think I’m hiding any motherfucking thing from you. I’m just all up and concerned you’re going to feel differently for me if you see how I actually fucking live…” Her face was priceless.

Before she could speak, he cut her off. “I know. Woah, Kurloz can talk. It’s complicated and hard to explain, but it’s a speech impairment… I can only really talk when I feel a shit ton of motherfucking emotions at once. Supposedly the doctor’s have never seen anything like it?”

Kurloz held a serious expression as (y/n) practically threw herself into him, going on her tip-toes to wrap her arms around his neck. “Kurloz, I would never think of you differently in a bad way! You’re my best goddamn friend, and I’ll accept you no matter what!”

Was she… crying? Oh, fuck. (Y/n) was definitely crying.

A small gasp escaped Kurloz’s lips as he stood there, surprised. He reluctantly held her body closer to his, nuzzling into her neck. “I just don’t want to see you hurt… Shhh, shhh… Stop crying, please.”

(Y/n) continued to sob silently into his chest for another few minutes. Kurloz comforted her the best he could, stroking her (h/l) (h/c) hair. She finally rolled back on her heels, pulling away slightly as she smiled at him.

Seeing her red, puffy face made him flinch. But that smile of hers… Kurloz couldn’t help but offer a small smile back. He realized then and there that he could trust (y/n), that she cared for him. Maybe… even loved him.

Woah, going pretty far there, Makara. Back track a bit, you’re just friends.

“If you care for me so much… I want to bring you somewhere next week. I didn’t even motherfucking bring Meulin there.” At that, (y/n) cocked her head. Before Kurloz could speak, she smiled. “Does this make me closer to you than Meulin?” She giggled.

Kurloz flinched, but ever so slightly nodded. “I motherfucking guess so, (y/n)…” He smiled at her cheerful expression. She nuzzled his collarbone, a soft sigh escaping her lips.

At this point, they both backed away from each other, making their way back to where their ‘bed’ was behind the counter. “Hey, ‘Loz?” (Y/n) asked as she settled down. Kurloz sat down beside her, brown-indigo hues staring intently at her.

Her (e/c) twinkled in the dark of night, a curious expression plastered on her face. She looked incredibly cute and innocent this way. It almost pained Kurloz’s heart to see her like that; like she thought the world was just fun and games.

“Where are you bringing me next week?” She casually asked, cocking her head once more. Okay, the way she cocked her head in curiosity was pretty cute. Kurloz opened his mouth to speak, but nothing came out.

He growled lowly, raising his hands. ‘It’s a surprise, my wicked sis.’ Kurloz brought a finger to his lip, winking. “Don’t mock me, Makara!” (Y/n) whined. Kurloz laughed softly at this, ruffling her hair. ‘Sorry, (y/n).’

(Y/n) leaned her head against his shoulder, letting out a loud sigh. “You know, you have a really nice voice…” She whispered. Kurloz responded by hooking his arm around her, giving his friend a tight squeeze.

“If you don’t mind me asking… Is the muteness caused by birth…?” (Y/n) whispered very slowly. Kurloz sat there for a few seconds, staring at his feet. “Y-you don’t have to answer that, by the way!” She jumped out of his grasp, face red.

Kurloz sat up, shaking his head. ‘I don’t know if you all up and know this, but Meulin and I were… an item at a time. You know, in a relationship and all that shit. Freshman year to Sophomore year. It was when we were leaving a motherfucking party, that I called a taxi to take us home… I should have fucking noticed that bastard was drunk!’

He snarled in anger, hands in fists. Kurloz slowly started to calm down, shaking his head. ‘I noticed the driver was driving a bit crazy, but I didn’t say a word… Suddenly, the car spun out of control and crashed into a near-by ravine.’

(Y/n) stared at him with wide eyes, a hand on his thigh in an attempt to comfort her friend. ‘Meulin had sensitive hearing from the start, but the way the tires screamed and the impact… I don’t motherfucking know, but it caused her to go 80% deaf. As for me… I didn’t have my seat belt on, and as the car rolled, the way I hit my damn head… knocked something up in there, ya’know?’

‘It’s all in the motherfucking past now, yeah? I can’t all up and do nothing about it anymore but move on.’ Kurloz stared at his feet. (Y/n) quickly scooped him up in her arms, kissing his forehead. “Fuck, I didn’t know… I’m so sorry, Kurloz.”

He wrapped his lengthy arms around her waist, sighing into her neck. They stayed like that for awhile, (y/n) softly humming soft words of encouragement into his ears.

Kurloz was the first to break the hug, signing slowly, ‘Thank you so much, my wicked sis. I’m glad we’re motherfucking friends, because you make me feel a lot better.’ She smiled brightly at this.

“We should get to bed, it’s probably late.” (Y/n) mumbled, glancing at her friend who nodded in agreement. Kurloz brought the covers over the both of them, lying back in an attempt to get comfortable.

Who the fuck could sleep on the cold floor? Definitely not comfortable in the slightest. Imagine having sex on the cold, hard floor- stop yourself. I know what you’re thinking.

(Y/n) snuggled against him for warmth, sighing in approval as Kurloz wrapped an arm around her. ‘Good night.’ He signed to her. She closed her eyes, laying her cheek against his chest. “Good night, Loz.”

And for the first time in a long time, they both fell asleep with a smile curved on their lips.